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music, science, humor, art,
genius,
brains, balls, money, time,
enough work to fuel the concept
and the prophetic clairvoyance to see the writing on this wall.
the truth, the love, the war, the lies, and the stupidity
it takes to really make popeye-x laugh his ass off,
and not stop laughing, because coming back to it years later needs to
make him laugh even more, and i'm talking about the same old shit!
after a full decade online, not only is it still funny as fuck, to popeye-x,
the fact that it will never be stopped seems funnier than a motherfucker!
that's all i ever hoped to accomplish by several decades of typing...
just to laugh... is that so very bad?
would you call that insane, mentally
unstable, or morally wrong?
i lost count of the irate readers who have claimed its not funny at all,
its a big chuck of endless nothing, and a total waste of time because
no one can even guess what the purpose of it all could be...
except for this one guy... it wasn't popeye-x, it was a guy calling himself
clever boy
and he told me technically why this site was wrong, and how i should do it
correctly,
it involved programming standards that are up to date, php, sql, perl, cgi,
java, etc.
and clever boy was totally 100% right, i couldn't agree more,
go ahead and tell me how to do it... teach me, i'm ready.
then i said something that was brilliant... i asked him to show me
his website, or any website in existence, done exactly like he said popeye-x
should do it
but i only had one caveat, this model of technical perfection must be
funnier than www.popeye-x.com is... to Dr.
POPEYE-X!
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 plus my grandmother used to pay
me $1 a page to type anything i wanted,
it was always faster to make something up from scratch
and while typing as fast as possible, be thinking of a clever ending,
something from the other side of the universe, coming in suddenly,
and here's the challenge... make this wacky off the wall "thing"
tie in perfectly with whatever the basic premise was at the start,
no matter what it was...
i could never remember how it started anyway,
so i would grab the stupidest excuse, or a pitifully feeble justification based
on
a blatant misunderstanding... but then prove it wasn't wrong after all by means
of
quickly brainstormed line of bullshit that championed idiocy over common
sense...
and i would type this out, i needed $5 for gas in my vw van?
i'd type 5 pages, and beeline to meemaw's house to collect the cash... so, you see, making up stuff
and typing it out,
i used to do it all the time, and i had my own method,
otherwise i could not finish it and have something to read
to maximize curiousity, i'd make the title sound really big,
then write the story so it was really small,
to avoid looking any thing up, i'd never use any word
i couldn't spell "close enough" already,
this led to a whole buncha words like buncha.
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i
don't make up any sentences beyond my mental capacity
to sound real smart to people who actually are real smart...
why? it takes too fucking long, you have to read books, i only had time to write books, so i opted for the
 most retarded ideas approach, and it worked very well for me
i found i could actually finish if i would only keep it retarded enough,
and then get it over with! quickly, deliberately, without any filler at all.
it was impossible to choose the right words to sound intelligent...
so i opted instead to just be stupid... and i'm talking about
ultra-stupid,
unburdened by what i never learned right, i stubbornly clung to the illusion
that
i had the power in my mind to make up my own encapsulisation of any idea,
just
using my own slang and juxtaposing words in new ways i've never heard of,
but
still making sense on a metaphorical level, also known as boiling it down, man,
to where anyone can understand it, and if they can't under stand
perfectly
crafted mental retardation,
then they obviously don't have what it takes for
something more properly established... and NORMAL.
that's the part i didn't
like, and wanted nothing at all to do with... so, now you know why this
website's entrance has always had these words arc-welded on the plate metal
toilet seat...
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