"HOT DAMN, ROY, CHAW A PLUG FOR THE GOV'MENT!" "YeeHaw!!...(ptoooy!)..."
"POP-A-TOP! for them Little Crippled Orphans! ....(buuuurrrrrp)....(bleeeech)"
You goddamn mentally crippled nosy-ass trouble making IDIOT mutherfuckers!

Fucking callin' ME on MY phone to ATTEMPT your lame-assed EXTORTION of MY $ for your so-called ANTI-DRUG "blank"
(fill-in-the-blank that always ends up) with ME paying YOU $$$ to take ORPHANS to the CIRCUS bullshit!!

First off, why would I want ANY KID to go ANYWHERE with A FUCKING COP?

You're trying to:

A) Pat yourself on the back while you shake me down so I can

B) Finance YOUR BIG goddamn ALCHOHOLIC WINGDING!

That's what you REALLY live for, right? (weekends?) When yer not real busy with the WAR ON DRUGS! (weekdays?)

FUCK YOU! YOU ain't nothin but Lowlife Lowbudget BLINDASS Hypocrites! So FULL of your own BULLSHIT, you never stop to THINK about WHAT YOU SAY, it's just "GO FOR YER GUN", you whitebread redneck chickenshit motherfuckers!

So I'll just sit here and WATCH YOU BLOW YOUR OWN TOES OFF, ONE BY ONE! As your OWN STUPIDITY arrives centerstage, SUPERSTARDOM will guide you, like some kinda HULK HOGAN/JERRY LEWIS with a .357, the audience gasps (!), as you DUST OFF YOUR OWN ASS! like its NOTHING... (we'll be laughin')

NOW get ready for the final spike, when I HIT you with a KEYBOARD missle strike!